Lesson in Female Futility

Filed under Junk Drawer.


Hair and weight, two elusive concepts for women. Maybe not all women, maybe just the ones I know. For years I’ve tried to get the perfect cut. Once in a while, it happens. A joyous moment, brief as the hair grows out. Even to return to the same hairdresser doesn’t guarantee a repeat style. It’s not the hairdresser’s fault. My hair is wild and rebellious. Sometimes that’s what I love about it. Other times, not so much.

Weight can be just as elusive. I remember my sister shared a story of one year when our mother was preoccupied by my sister’s weight. All psychology aside, I think of it often as a lesson in futility. Our mother nagged her for months, saying “if you just lost five pounds, you’d be perfect.” For whatever reason my sister listened and lost those last few five pounds. Did nirvana occur? Did every dream come true? No, my mother then worried that she looked too thin, and nagged her to be careful and perhaps gain a few pounds to make sure she wasn’t too thin. This is where I throw my hands up in the air, take a deep breath, and remember these physical features are what they are, and to try to reach perfect is insanity. Rather, we should learn to love what we have, to accept it, and work with it in love and care for ourselves. At least that is what my sister and I tell ourselves every time our mother makes a suggestion regarding our weight or hair.

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